singularityooc | ...herp derp

This may seem sudden but in light of circumstances that have been building for a while, I feel that I must leave Sing. Lain, Carolina, Arthur (who hasn't intro'd yet) and Hanna are going home. Psi and Chi can stay with Maine if Chelsey prefers. NPC Lev will be taken over by another mod at the team's discretion.

Er.

I promised myself I'd never do one of those backpedaling drop posts, but you can definitely thank Vic for smacking me a good one and having me change my mind. I'll be staying around, though my role on the moderation team may change.

As some know, I am a full-time grad student in addition to holding several jobs. The combined stress was taking its toll on my ability to stay involved with the game, but I am working now with my fellow mods to arrange a better solution. I never wanted to leave anyone holding the bag and I definitely have some big plans for the game itself. If I can continue to be involved creatively I would be honored if you all would still have me.

So, my biggest apologies to the playerbase at large. I know this break in composure isn't, er, very flattering, but thank you everyone for being sympathetic and helping to ensure Sing stays on track. ;3;

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YEAH I just set it out there on my first day of grad school that a) I basically live online, all you see IRL is just my hologram, and b) I find everything I do pretty much worthwhile, including this. Once I mentioned I ran a game (didn't give the name, ffff) that was inspired by Ray Kurzweil, I think everyone got a sense of what my area of expertise was and where not to fuck with me.

:C BUT THEN I HAVE PEOPLE IN MY COHORT WHO ARE LIKE if it's not a fancy latte and a Salon podcast and The New Yorker it's not academics. I just console myself with the reality that they're a dying breed and what they study will soon be covered under the history department.

This semester has been enough to indicate I probably don't want to be a professional academic, but I won't tolerate a single damn person telling me I'm not qualified as a theorist. I'm the only one in my cohort working as a critic professionally, tyvm.

I went to a public university for undergrad, so it wasn't as though I was at a small school, but the film program was so tiny and intimate and above all, emphasized practice, not ten dollar words to describe everyday ideas. But the larger scale of the film program here and how marginal crit studies is certainly hasn't helped with alienation, hurrrgh. Every week I contemplate dropping out and just being a professional critic, but try getting a decently paying position in that when they can get an 18-year-old to do it for a free game a couple times a month.

I need to read Kurzwiel god damn it. I am a Bad Transhumanist for not having done so yet. He's... next on my list, though my current thesis is about the American fandom experience... but at some point in my writing I really, really, REALLY want to do a long piece (or series) about transhumanism as a legit expression of human nature, especially since like... the ideals it represents goes back as far as the Chinese.

But i'm so terrified that neither of these things are going to be taken seriously. to do a proper nonfiction book on the fan convention as an american institution I would need money and - [/babbles]

(PS part of the reason I joined this game was that I was like TRANSHUMANIST PHILOSOPHY!? /SLAMS INTO)

And god, yes. I had wanted to be a teacher, but now I'm just like oh fuck it all. idk.

ahem

this is the same reason I ended up not going into lit / theater criticism orz. It's still something I may want to do but there's moar monies in nonfiction writing / publishing industry. And the latter thing is a dying breed too...

/babbles

...herp derp

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